Resume.

Posted on Jun 2, 2016 | 1 comment


David The Page

Strange Musician, Marketeer of The Little Guy, & E’lir of The University.

 

Experience & Credentials

 

1984 – Manifested in Flesh Form.

 

1994 – Began playing the guitar.

 

1996 – Formed first band, E Point O.

 

1997 – Forewent Bar Mitzva to instead begin studies at the College Heights Library in San Diego, and go to Pearl Jam Concert.

 

2000 – Began school at Idyllwild Arts Academy.

 

2002 – Graduated High School by the skin of his teeth. Was granted full scholarship to Cornish College of the Arts in Seattle.

 

2003 – Left College due to injury & irony.

 

2005 – Mistakenly claimed to have discovered El Dorado; turned out to be Phoenix, AZ.

 

2006 – Went on multi-state tour with new band for several months.

 

2007-2008 – Taught High School English & Literature.

 

2009 – Mistakenly claimed to have discovered The Lost City of Atlantis; turned out to be Phoenix, AZ again.

 

2009 – Returned to San Diego, began marketing for small independent businesses, artists, & musicians.

 

2011 – Mistakenly claimed to have found Themiscyra; turned out to be Idyllwild, CA. Immediately gained employment at INK Book gathering. Became The Humble Book Dude; became responsible for book reviews, inventory, and general peace-keeping.

2011 – Met Rick Barker & forced him to teach me everything about Evolution, Obscure Music, & Naming.

 

2012 – Began playing music at Higher Grounds Coffee Shop with Pete Pedro Anderson every Saturday Night under the name Pedro & The Page.

 

2013 – Became a major part of Pedro & The Pages, playing with a full band at Higher Grounds, and all around making sure everyone (including us) had a good time. We succeeded. Huzzah.

 

2014 – Began giving Marketing advice to local businesses & artists.

 

2014 – Finally convinced Mr. Barker that I am almost human, and thus an ideal candidate for a student.

 

2014 – Mr. Barker’s book hit the shelves, and thus my life was improved.

 

2014 – Met My Lady. Nothing has been the same since – for the better.

 

2014 – Found The Lost City of Atlantis. Finally got one right.

 

2015ish – Went on to start a solo career as a musician. Also began running all marketing for Higher Grounds.

 

2016 – Released first album under David The Page.

 

2016 – High-Fived Rick Barker.

 

2017 – Found the real El Dorado. Everyone there thinks Taco Bell is amazing. I introduced them to Robert’s Jalapeno Sauce & became a God to them.

 

2018 – Accepted the Lifetime Achievement Award for my music. Presented to me by Tom Waits & Dave Grohl. I accepted via Skype, as there were too many people there for my liking.

 

2019 – Discovered a new continent: New Canada.

 

2020 – Was asked to go back in time & play for then-to-be President Gerald Ford’s twenty-first birthday.

 

2021 – Reassembled Pangea.

 

2022 – Broke apart Pangea; keeping Wales, Iceland & California attached.

 

2023 – Went back in time to 2016 to High-Five Rick Barker.

 

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